|Not by the hair on my chinny chin chin.|
This is the worst. I used to joke about old ladies with their chin hairs. I even mentioned the topic in previous posts. Serves me right. I never thought it would happen to me. Or if it did, I'd be 80.
A few days ago I went to my hair stylist, Sarah. It had been awhile since I had been in and she was giving me the works--haircut, color and eyebrow wax. I told her about my horror in finding the mutant hair. We had a good laugh.
But since we were on the subject of facial hair and my head was already tilted back in the sink, I asked her to check my "beauty mark" (which really is a mole on my chin) to make sure there wasn't anything less than beautiful there. Like a hair. She checked.
No, she didn't see any hairs. Then she stopped. And leaned in close. "Oh." What's oh? "But, you do have..." Alarmed, I popped my head up from the sink. What? What do I have?!
She got out a tweezers and yanked. A hair. Under my chin. Satisfied, she held it up. "See," she showed me. "Interesting. There's a little curl to it."
Aaaaaccccch! I felt woozy. This was just too, too much. So, how long had it been there? I hadn't seen it that morning when I was assessing the state of my face. Was it like a hybrid hair that morphed within a matter of hours? Or had it been there all along, but I just couldn't see it without my cheater reading glasses?
I was thoroughly disgusted. But I felt a little better when I discussed The Hair with the ladies at work the next day.Turns out about everyone my age and older has had the nasty little discovery. We all agreed you can't see the little suckers. Only when you get in the car and look in your overhead mirror can you see them. One gal said she keeps a magnifying glass on hand at all times.
I had thought I was over my midlife crisis. I had come to terms with my children marrying and moving away, my turning gray and getting age spots. But having chin hairs? Really? I refuse to make peace with chin hairs. From here on in, it's war.
I'm keeping my tweezers and cheaters stashed in the car.